As humans, we have this thing called negativity bias. We tend to place more emphasis on negative things in life rather than positive.
Therefore, when times are difficult, we are truly hard on ourselves. We beat ourselves up for the things we should have done, for the things we are not, and for who we have become.
Can you be kind to yourself?
This is something my therapist asked me two years ago and it sounded foreign. It was as though I did not understand the language she was speaking.
We are told every day to say please, thank you and sorry to others because it is kind and polite. But what about ourselves?
We owe kindness to ourselves too. Here are 4 things to say to yourself when you are at your lowest.
1. I Am Sorry
This is a powerful thing to say to yourself. Try saying this out loud, I bet many of us won’t have the courage to do this.
Forgiving someone is much easier than forgiving yourself. Because forgiving someone means to be able to put the blame on them and then forgive them.
But to forgive yourself is to truly acknowledge that you have caused yourself pain and you have to own up to it.
2. Look How Far You’ve Come
As mentioned, we tend to focus on negative things. We need to try to train our brains to look at the positives.
Instead of saying, “I’m disappointed for not getting that job”. Tell yourself, well at least I made it through the final interview stage, which means I have so much more potential in me than I realize.
Encourage yourself to see how much you’ve progressed. It could be in school, work, fitness, anything really. There are always two sides to a coin.
3. Pain Means Progress
When we go through pain, a lot of us come out stronger.
Pain is an opportunity to grow. I can’t remember where I’ve read this before, but if you have any idea where this quote came from, feel free to reach out to me on my Instagram.
When the pain of remaining the same is more than the pain of change, change will take place.
This is a quote that has never failed me. It might not work for everyone, but I do think that it has helped people with a shift of mindset.
4. You Are Loved
I know this sounds cliche. But no matter how cliche this sounds, people still act like they don’t know this exists.
If it’s so “cliche” then it should be so obvious, but a lot of the time it is not.
We forget that we are surrounded by people who love us. When we are sad and angry our emotions take over and we end up being blinded by so much hate and pain that we don’t see the abundance of love we are able to receive from the universe.
This world is a huge world. Love is out there, somewhere.
Sonia Singh is a content writer under Headliner by Newswav, a programme where content creators get to tell their unique stories through articles and at the same time monetize their content within the Newswav app.
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